Unidentified But Hilarious

dang alien varmints ain't goin take over mah town, dagnabbit So a funny thing happened recently. I wrote a short story, sent if off and it was... accepted! For a humorous SF/F anthology called Unidentified Funny Objects 5. Woo hoo!

It's on sale now, or at least the Kindle version is. The print version is out next week, and I have my author copy clutched in my hot little hands as I type (yes, I'm a contortionist). It does look rather nice.

Many more people than me are in it, of course. There's David Gerrold (The Trouble with Tribbles) and Shaenon Garrity (Skin Horse and Narbonic), just to begin with. Huge, huge thanks go to the editor, Alex Shvartsman, who saw fit to pluck my story from the slush pile and add it to the collection.

My contribution is Customer Service Hobgoblin, in which Robin Goodfellow - hobgoblin, trickster, Shakespeare-botherer and general pain-in-the-backside - has as much fun as his manager will allow while working in a rather unusual call centre.

So if you're moved to spend a fancy-coffee's-worth of cash on something that will make you much happier for far longer, here are the links:

US Kindle - UK Kindle - Barnes & Noble - Kobo



Much To My Surprise, I Am Not Dead Yet

Bleurgh...but one or two of you might have thought I was. So this is an apology, most especially to anyone who was reading Twenty Years Ago Today, which I put on hiatus after two instalments and have regretfully decided not to return to. Life got in the way, I'm afraid. Right now, I am officially Not At All Well. I'll be having heart surgery sometime in the next few months. But I should survive the experience and return to something like normality next year.

In the meantime, though, I've been busy! Something new will be coming out in the next few weeks, and for once it's not something I'm publishing myself. More on that when it happens!

That's it for now. See you soon!

The Inevitable Apocalyptic Consequence of Time Travel

TIACOTT Cover 200x320 It's time for another one of these things! Because time travel is a lot more dangerous than most SF has led you to believe. Four people stumble on the secret of time travel at four different points in history, and immediately begin to use it against their enemies - then swiftly discover that their enemies are just as willing to use it on them. The final escalation is inevitable... Now all I need to do is invent time travel myself so I can get these things written faster. This one took long enough that I'm going to delay the next one for a bit, until I've made some substantial progress on Twenty Years Ago Today. That's the thing about apocalypses: they tend to be a lot more complex than you first assume...

The Last Tour of Kelwort Castle

TLTOKC Cover 320x200Blimey. I've done something else new. And it's something short! Well, okay, it was meant to be a short story and it ended up being a novella (just), but that's what happens when you apply the historical lessons of castle sieges to survival techniques in a post-apocalyptic environment: it gets interesting! The Last Tour of Kelwort Castle is an archaeological reconstruction of a tour group, taken largely from the video they recorded of the tour guide giving them useful lessons in the history of the castle. Nuclear war then interrupts the tour, and we discover what happened to them afterwards in a series of reports made by the archaeologists. Did they learn the lessons on how to survive in a castle? Or did they just end up repeating history?

Long-time readers will be happy to hear that it's set in the multiverse of The Last Man on Earth Club (where else am I going to get interdimensional archaeologists?), though this isn't relevant for much of the story and you don't need to read anything else to understand what's going on.

This is also the first (well, second, really) in a series of shorter pieces about apocalypses called Apocalyptic Tales. Moment of Extinction has been rebadged under this title, just because it fits. I'll be adding new ones every month or so in an attempt to keep my name popping up in connection with my preferred genre, as well as building up material for an eventual collection.

All of which means I should really get back to working on Twenty Years Ago Today. Worlds don't end all by themselves, you know...



Twenty Years Ago It's Still Today

After many long months of toil, here it is at last! Part Two of this ongoing serialised novel depicting the mounting disaster that happens after one man's dying wish comes true for the whole world: to go back in time by twenty years. It's $1.99 or the equivalent, higher than Part One because it ended up with a high enough word count to be classed as novel-length (62k in the end). Still pretty cheap, though. It can be found at the usual places: Amazon UK, Amazon US, Smashwords, Kobo and a few more still to come.

Also new is the cover! It took many long hours figuring out how not to embarrass myself in Blender, but in the end it seems to have come out pretty well. Part One has a similar update, and I hope to be able to use the same style throughout the rest of the series. Unless I have any more brilliant ideas along the way :-)

Part Three is now in the works, but will probably take as long as Part Two did. All that research takes time! Not to mention the editing. Argh, the editing...

In the meantime, I'll be using some of my time to get on with a series of short stories about all the wonderful ways in which the world can end, to appear once a month. Yeah, I know, this slows things down, but it's all to do with the way ebook publishing works: each new book falls off the radar after about a month, so you need to get stuff out as regularly as possible to give people a chance to find your work. More on this when I get the first one done in early January!

Still Writing

Yep. And I'm not dead! It may feel like it sometimes, but life is still stirring, and part 2 of Twenty Years Ago Today has finished its first draft at 56k words. It's somewhat longer than I expected, but with rather more rioting and refugees and nooses hung from lamp-posts outside BBC Television Centre than I originally thought possible. So I think it'll be worth the wait. Right. Best get back to it. Lots to do...